Free to Fly
by Amanda9
Summary: We had all ended up in places we never expected, with people we never thought of. Watching as time passed.


**_Free to Fly  
_By:** Amanda  
**Feedback:** sweety167yahoo.ca  
**Rating:** Strong PG-13  
**Disclaimer:** I'm just playing with JK Rowling's toys. I promise to put them back when I'm done, whenever that is.  
**Spoilers:** whole series, up to Deathly Hallows  
**Pairing: **Lucius/Bellatrix  
**Summary: **We had all ended up in places we never expected, with people we never thought of. Watching as time passed.  
**Completed: **August 23, 2007  
**Notes: **I blame it all on the look they shared in OotP.

* * *

I watched her pile the long coils of black hair up on her head, exposing that pale neck.  
"Marry me," the words left my mouth before my mind has a chance to filter it. It was always like that with Bella. 

"Can't," she replied simply, bluntly as she continued to dress.

"Why?" I can't help the dreamy tone out of my voice, or the look that's sure to be on my face.  
She stood, fastening her robes; I could feel the bed rise without her added weight. "I'm marring Rodolphus."

"Lastrange?!" my world darkened and closed in around me. Around us.

She gave a curt nod. Nothing more.

"Why?" I followed her out of bed, seeing no reason to hide my nakedness, no shame in it. After all, she had been seeking it not too long ago.

"Lucious," she gave me one note of her dry laugh. But didn't answer.  
"Why?" I pressed again; my heart threatening to rip itself out of my chest before crashing to the floor.

She sighed. Her mouth still swollen and red. "He's of a fine bloodline. A strong family match. Pureblood and wealth."  
I stood before her, chest puffed up and defiant, "Am I not those things?"

She almost seemed amused by my defence. "You are," she trailed a sharp nail down my pale cheek. It stung and I shivered. "But, he is older. And being the eldest daughter, its much better matched."

I almost laughed as I grabbed hold of her wrist, forcing her to stay this close to me, against me, "Do you love him?"

She stared back into my eyes, never wavering; "You should marry Narcissa."  
I took a step back, repelled; "You'd do that? Condemn your sister to marry someone who didn't love her?"

"It's not about love," her frustration flashed in her dark eyes, "You and she would be a good match. Some might consider perfect. Besides," she flicked her hand away, "Cissy is very fond of you."

I snorted, an act as childish as I felt. She could just pass me on that quickly, that easily. Oh so logically.

Bellatrix snaked her pale arms around me like a python, her tongue licking at my ear, "Don't be mad Lucius." The way she'd hiss my name sent shivers down my spine, and she smirked against my skin. "Go, have beautiful, fair babies with Narcissa. Enjoy her."

I closed my eyes against the thought, tried to will the images from my mind. "When?"

She uncoiled herself from me, "Immediately following graduation." She knew I couldn't fight it, wouldn't. That was today. That was why she waited. Or never would have told me at all. It's all that simple for her.

"Don't expect a gift," I sneered, trying to shrug off the chill tightening around my throat, the burning at the back of my eyes. The stab in my chest.

"Oh, but you already gave one," she smiled, that wicked twist of her mouth.

With a crack she was gone, and for all I knew falling into Lastrange's sheets. His arms.

--------

Months later, Narcissa smiled up at me with a Veela like child sleeping in her arms.

I hated him for the dark hair he doesn't have.

I hated her for giving him to me.

--------

I watched the wild curls of her hair break free and fall around her shoulders. She laughed, a deep, dark cackle – like a taunting secret.

She knew the reason why I was there, what had lead me to this place at this time. The only reason the mark was burned into my flesh was the hope of feeling her flesh burn against mine again.

Her eyes danced with a new life: unable to stay still, to stay calm. Her whole body pulsated and hummed.

Flashing her wicked smile for me, she leaned in to share the Dark Lord's ear. I watched every curve of her mouth, counted the number of times her tongue slipped out to lick at her lips. I felt the jealousy burn into the back of my neck.

And the whole while, she knew I was watching, waiting, and following.

"Malfoy," the Dark Lord's attention momentarily fell to me.

The bow of my head was a sign of respect I'm not sure I felt, and the loyalty I'm forced to show, "My Lord." The whole time my eyes never left Bella.

"I hear you're the loyal sort," his mouth twisted unnaturally and Bellatrix cackled. "I have something for you to do with Lastrange."

I forgot myself, and my eyes lit up.

She laughed deeply.

The amusement is obvious in His face; twisted glee, "Rodolphus, of course. I need Bellatrix for something more." I watch his long, boned fingers as they slithered across her neck.

I wanted to break his hand.

Rodolphus, standing at my side, didn't seem to notice, he didn't blink. His eyes are glazed, and he nodded. He already knew of our mission.

Fighting the bile that rose in my throat and the sneer pulling at my face, I issue a word of compliance.  
"Your loyalty will benefit your young family. Remember that Lucius," He hissed out the not so veiled threat. The warning.

I managed another nod and Bellatrix rewarded me with a smile.

My heart leaped. I still had her favour. I could still gain her attention. I chance was still there.  
A quiet exchange happened between us. A sign that more could come: for a moment she looked as she did on our last afternoon together – all pale and beauty.

But the Lord cracked it with his bellowed hiss of a voice, "Where is that boy? Regulus, I need something from you."

And it was time for Lastrange and I to leave – we had to meet Pettergrew.

--------

Weeks later, I pleaded ignorance and Imperius curses when He fell.

I quietly watched Bellatrix laugh herself all the way to Azkaban. Savoured every last note of it.

I didn't think I'd hear it again.

--------

I watched raven hair coil around me in my dreams. The memory of a cackled laugh filling the quiet years. Then the storm hit. The tempest was free.

I welcomed the coming disaster.

She was thin and malnourished, but her eyes were hungry. Starved. And I watched her, still. The voyeuristic curiosity was too much to surpress. And I wanted her, still. Needed her like the oxygen I was denied for fifteen years. Now I could finally breathe.

Could live.

"Lucius," Bellatrix's voice was alight with joy and excitement. She laughed at the moon – to spite it, because of it or just simply to fill the silence in her head. I was never sure, but was happy enough to see it.

She tangled her fingers in my hair, raking her ragged fingernails across my scalp. "We get to go to the Ministry!" she sing-songed in a way I had never heard before.

But with her attention on me, I couldn't care. My flesh came to life at her touch, my desire sang out for her.

And I noticed Narcissa as she watched.

She only nodded as Bellatrix's smile grew darker and more wicked.

"Does little Cissy suspect?" Bellatrix turned in mouth into the mockery of a pout, and laughed into my ear. "Don't wait up sister dear," she added with a wink to Narcissa before pulling her wand and disappearing in a crack.

Narcissa continued to stare with her usual stoic expression, "She's told me. Told me of your great _passion_."

I studied her, searching for a sign of violent anger, of outburst, of anything – but found none.

"Oh, and what was yours?" For a moment, I imagined some night of shared secrets between sisters. Laughing at the fool caught in the middle. How we had all ended up in places we never expected, with people we never thought of.

The corner of her mouth twitched, but her gaze held steady, "Only you husband." She leaned her cold, pale cheek against mine, her mouth next to my ear and all but cooed, "Be well," before pressing her thin lips to my cheek.

I left then.

--------

There is no time in Azkaban.

Only dark.

Only cold.

Until the light comes.

--------

I watched the tangled mess of her hair bob through my house: the manor where I was no longer the master. The place I no longer had power.

Bella did not grant me favour: no exaggerated smiles, no wild eyes, not even the most casual of touches.

Narcissa did not come for, nor comfort her husband.

Draco did not notice his father.

The world I was accustomed to changed without me, continued without me.

"Lucius!" the bony and ashen hand had reached for my wand. "Loyalty will serve your family well," he offered to remind me, "but arrogance is severely punished."

Bellatrix laughed, the dry cackle vibrating off the walls and in my head. Teasing me with hazy memories and fragmented thoughts.

The feel of her supple body at twilight danced in my eyes.

He snarled at her, and she quivered. Eager to excuse the insolence.

She had always chosen over me. Beyond me.

It would break her as sure as it had broken me.

We'd storm the great castle, fight the Great War.

Be tricked by a child.

I watched.

She fell like a porcelain doll. Too perfect for this world. Too precious to be kept.

But the cry isn't mine.

It isn't Narcissa's.

I saw the Dark Lord's face contort in a moment of defeat, maybe regret, before the room glows again with green and red. And noise.

I coiled myself around my wife and my son.

It's all there is now.

--------

Time continues.

-end-


End file.
